slythwolf: Some unlucky soul has an incomplete Pai Sho set. (Default)
So yeah, I haven't been using my computer much recently. My ass has been untangling yarn, winding it into neat balls, putting the balls in boxes and (zomg) labeling them with lists of their contents so I will actually (gasp!) know where the hell things are.

You guys, I have found so many sets of needles I had lost.

I think by Monday I will be done with the yarn portion of the craft closet and can get started on the fabric portion. Then I can go through the piles in the rest of the room, and those won't take nearly as long, maybe a day for each.

Meanwhile, I have done a little bit of shopping. Taking the time, on the days I have the car, to scour Goodwill has paid off with two dark knee-length skirts, one pair of black trousers, one pair of beige linen trousers, three sleeveless shells (black, red and turquoise), a green silk long-sleeved blouse and a black-and-camel tartan short-sleeved blouse. Still no sign of a decent-fitting black blazer. I will probably have to break down and make one myself, which will mean taking that tailoring book back out of the library. I also have to put some shaping into the green blouse and take the waists in on the skirts and trousers.

I also need to alter three or four button-downs that I have, remove the pleats from the charcoal wool trousers I have for my Hogwarts uniform, and find another white button-down that doesn't have that split V-neck thing going on that women's button-downs always seem to have, because you can't wear a tie with one of those things and my old Hogwarts uniform shirt has been donated. It was a medium. It is to laugh. Also I should suck it up, frog my mostly-completed Hogwarts jumper, and reknit it in a 42" chest. When I started it, 40" had some ease. It doesn't anymore.

And I need to find a half slip to wear with the unlined skirt. And probably also find a summery printed type of skirt and make a light-colored blazer I can wear with that and the linen trousers. And maybe take the pleats out of the front of the linen trousers because seriously, pleats do no one's gut any favors.

Also I need new hose. Whether they will be stockings or pantyhose I have not yet determined but I need new ones; the old ones are too little, except the fishnet stockings which are remarkably elastic. And if I do stockings then I need a beige garter belt. I have a little white one, but it is really too small and makes a strange dent in the sides of my hips.

Also: shoes. I almost spent $35 on a pair of taupe leather almond-toe mid-heel pumps at T.J. Maxx today. They were so classic and sophisticated. But I just cannot spend that much on a pair of shoes until I get a job. I do have a pair of low black pumps but the toes are slightly damaged and they really don't fit well enough to be worth repairing. They will work for interviews for the time being.

And I need to get four links taken out of my watch. Did I mention my wrists are still 5 1/2" around? Yeah.

Anyway, I am also trying to find a couple pairs of shorts, because the last time I bought a pair I was a size 10 so those are gone. And I should probably get a belt and a couple pieces of cheap jewellery.

Anyway, all of this stuff has to be put off until I have the craft stuff organized. There is no point in trying to figure out my sewing machine if I can't actually get to the chair to sit down at it. So tonight I will be in front of the TV some more, untangling and rewinding some more yarn.
slythwolf: Some unlucky soul has an incomplete Pai Sho set. (Default)
Y'all, my dad gave me some cash for food until the food stamps came through, like, literally the day before the food stamps came through, and since my ass1 has expanded beyond the comfortable proportions of all my currently-owned pants, and I am a size 14-16 woman wearing a size 10 winter coat, I am taking the cash shopping.

I am currently planning The Route. Along The Route are stationed five or six consignment and thrift shops in town, through which I will make my circuitous way looking for The Coat and some pants, on the way to the street the mall is on, where I will also find TJ Maxx. TJ Maxx will hopefully have a coat in my size for cheap if I can't find one at the thrift/consignment shops. Then, if all else fails, there is Sears and JCPenney clearance. And if that fails me, I will stalk the eBay women's outerwear section for a while longer.

Why, you might ask, do I not just go buy a coat at Walmart? Well, because I'm picky. Among relevant aspects of my pickiness in this instance are my distaste for synthetic parkas and color-blocked windbreaker-looking winter coats and preference for something classic and mid-thigh-to-knee-length in at least a wool blend2, and my insistence that any coat I buy actually be long enough in the arms, which usually means tall sizes.

Tall sizes are a huge dilemma for me, y'all. I have these obnoxiously long arms and legs3, but I also have this obnoxiously short waist.4 But then I also have these obnoxiously enormous breasts. And so the combination of all this means that I wind up buying tall sizes in things like shirts and coats, and because of The Tits, the waist falls in the right place in the front, but about 4" lower in the back. I just have to suck it up until I become more proficient with my sewing machine and can make this stuff myself.

Tall sizes in pants are not nearly as problematic. The problem I have in pants is that they never have enough ass depth, including the Right Fit ones, and the back waist is always lower than the front waist. I have this problem with pants, too, if my UK and anglophile peeps follow me.

Wolfie has a bubble butt, or what may variously be known as "badonkadonk" and/or "I like big butts and I cannot lie" and/or "fat-bottomed girls, you make the rocking world go round".

Meanwhile, in each store, I am going to comb through the lingerie section and see if there are any cheap and/or clearance bras in my size. I ordered two from eBay, noticed the seller was in Hong Kong and shipping takes 12-30 business days, and have been waiting a week for a shipping notice; I need something now. I can't be waiting around. My band size has gone up to 32, and I can only stand to wear my 30s for about three hours before sharp, horrific pain blooms in a bright line around my underbust. Also they make that sort of little ridge of back fat, like a reverse muffin top, sticking out from the bottom edge of the band, which is considered unsightly under clothing and, while it shouldn't matter because that kind of thing is bullshit, will plant the subconscious idea in the heads of potential interviewers that I am not "put together" or whatever. Also also, the band tries to crawl down to a thinner part of my rib cage and takes support with it, so I am standing hunched over like my grandmother again.5

Bright side: this means I'm a 32DDD/E(UK)/F(US) instead of a 30F(UK)/G(US), and stores like Macy's actually carry a few bras in my size. Which means I can try bras on before I actually purchase them, maybe, and not have to pay return shipping when most of them don't fit.6

Meanwhile, also, I have to buy new makeup. I could not give less of a shit about makeup, y'all, and would be perfectly happy with the dusty little tubes and compacts in the old makeup box I bought in college, but when I did an Interview Makeup test run, my face broke out and my eyes were stinging for three days. Also the texture of it all was just bad news. That shit is A) expired, B) contaminated with badness and bacteria or C) both.

Which makes sense since the newest items were the ones I bought for my wedding a year and a half ago. And I couldn't actually find that stuff. Supposedly you're supposed to buy new makeup every 6 months or something? Yeah. Bad badness.

Anyway. I have about $200 to do all this. I need a winter coat, that's priority #1, because I can't be going around in one that's two sizes too small. I need one pair of jeans. I can wear the same pair all week and then wear the ones that don't fit while I'm doing the laundry, I'm all right with that, but if I could find two for cheap I would be really happy. If I see interview clothes on the clearance rack that look amazing on me and are under $15 per garment, I'll pick them up, but it's not a priority, because that's one of the things MRS7 can help me with once I get through their orientation process. And I need to get makeup, probably including stupid foundation, which is a pain in the ass to buy because the palest shade8 is always optimized for natural redheads, who tend to have warm undertones. Mine are cool. Maybe I will just skip it.

Oh, and I need to get a new purse. One that my stuff actually fits in without bulging out, and that has a shorter drop than the one I have so it will sit on the shelf of my hip without the straps falling off my shoulder. I can't carry a purse that hangs down alongside my hip, it's uncomfortable; I have a nice purse gap area between my arm and waist that works, but to have something against my hip I have to stick my elbow out funny and it just doesn't work.

Anyway, after that Nigel and I may be going to the movies, if we can find anything on that we're willing to see. Which is pretty doubtful. White America is all het up over Avatar right now and you know I'm not going to see that. Of course Sherlock Holmes is already gone, fuck you Carmike. I kind of want to see Daybreakers, but Nigel doesn't.

Anyway. Hopefully I will find all of the stuff I need. Probably I will find some of the stuff I need. If I can't find any of it I will be sad.

1. Well, really the discomfort is in the gut area when I sit down, but since Fashion Bug no longer carries the Right Fit jeans I like, any new pants I buy are going to be way too big in the waist anyway, and it is also true that I'm wearing pants for a 40.5" hip while having a 43.5" hip.
2. And I don't mean 90% poly 10% wool. That shit will not stand. I live in Michigan; I need something that will actually keep me warm.
3. Like everyone else in my mom's family. Although it may actually be due to my joint condition.
4. Apparently the rule of thumb is that average-waisted women can fit two hand-widths between the bottom of their tits and their natural waist. I can barely fit one hand-width, and I have tiny hands.
5. My paternal grandmother, the short Italian one with enormous breasts. Which is where I think I get my enormous breasts and short torso, especially the latter if my long limbs are joint-condition-related.
6. And most of them won't, because the current bra sizing system takes into account only ribcage circumference and breast volume, not breast depth or width or height, so I have to find not only the right size but a cut and style that fits.
7. Michigan Rehabilitation Services helps people with disabilities find appropriate employment.
8. Women at the other end of the shade spectrum have an even harder time, because I have seen the darkest shade of foundation most companies make and half the black women I know are darker than that. Dear makeup companies: clue. Get one.
slythwolf: Some unlucky soul has an incomplete Pai Sho set. (Default)
What I'm inspired by is vintage clothing, especially things from the 1800s, the Elizabethan times.

Now, you might think she's referencing those as two separate time periods, but in the very next sentence she calls it "that period".

Ms. Rocha, you fail history forever because Elizabeth I was queen in the 1500s, not the 1800s. I think you are probably thinking of Victoria.
slythwolf: Some unlucky soul has an incomplete Pai Sho set. (Default)
Cut out the muslins today to check my bodice and skirt slopers for fit. I have the bodice one put together and am wearing it right now and--omg--it doesn't need any adjustments.

Is it me, or am I awesome?

I'm just going to take a pen and doodle princess seams on it so I can go ahead and take that apart and trace it out. And then I'm going to take the original sloper and chop it up to give it an empire waist with vertical bust darts, and use that to make camisoles and full slips.

I have some satin with an Asian-inspired jacquard design in this nice green color left over from when I made my bridesmaids' purses, and I'm going to make a test camisole out of that. Cutting on the bias is something I haven't done before, so definitely a dry run before I start ordering silk. And oh yes, my slips and camisoles will be silk. I cannot be having with polyester; it doesn't breathe. I can get silk charmeuse from Fashion Fabrics Club for something like $9 a yard, so: win.

I need to get me a table for my sewing machine or this all is going to take about ten times longer than it has to. And I need to get me some silk pins, but I'm sure I can pick those up at Hobby Lobby.

Meanwhile I still have to put my skirt muslin together. I'll probably try it by itself and then attach it to the bodice to make sure my waist is where I'm fairly sure it is.

Anywho I had better get going on this seamline-drawing thing; sitting up straight in this thing is starting to hurt my back, because all my bras that fit are starting to fall apart. I have no support and my tits want to pull my shoulders forward.
slythwolf: Some unlucky soul has an incomplete Pai Sho set. (Default)
So once in a while I'll post about some garb I'm making or something ongoing I'm working on but the thing is, there are a lot of other little projects I work on that you, the readers, never get to hear about.

Today I finished a work of cross-stitch bearing the legend "EAT COLD STEEL PIGDOG". The Discworld fans in the house will probably know what that's all about.

Additionally, I've been drafting slopers for myself--it's a strange and frustrating process, because with my enormous breasts, my tiny waist, and my short torso (not 7" armpit to waist as I had originally thought, but six and a half omfg), the angles are just not at all something the available instructions anticipate. For instance, it's pretty much impossible for me to make a sloper that's going to fit with only one dart in it. I need to have the waist dart--wider than is generally standard--and then I need about a 3-4" underarm dart. Most likely I will just change it to a princess-seam sloper because I'm pretty much just going to put them in everything; I think they look better than the waist-and-underarm dart combination. One with standard princess seams, one with shoulder ones, maybe? Hmm.

I have to do a lot of fudging and retracing and so I start with tracing paper. I'm not going to put anything on the more durable paper I have until I've fitted some muslins and know it's right.

So after about five, six hours' work last night, I have a preliminary front bodice sloper. The back is going to go a lot more quickly, but I just cannot face spreading all my crap out on the floor again to get started.

When I do a skirt sloper that will also probably be easier; while I do have a tiny waist and enormous hips and ass, the nature of the darts and whatnot in skirts is such that it's not going to be as weird. Although I did realize something the other day.

[ profile] bloodchan gave me a bunch of clothes she didn't want anymore, fairly recently, that are cute and happened to fit me. I took a grey plaid pleated skirt that is a little big in the waist on the basis that it was going to be easy to take it in.

Well, easy, yes, just a bit of sewing, anyone can do it.

The trouble is, when I pin the waist to where it needs to be, and unzip the zipper, I can't get the skirt down over my hips. That's how big the difference between my waist and hips is. That's how much of an hourglass I am. I am such an hourglass that when I make skirts and trousers that will fit me, I'm going to have to use a longer zipper than standard.

Maybe I can do a standard zipper in the normal place, and also insert a hidden zipper into the side seam on one side. Things that already take hidden side zippers--well, I can put another one on the other side, or I can use a longer zipper. It needs thinking about.

Anyway. My plan is to make two wool suits (jacket, skirt and trousers) and two linen ones; some other pairs of trousers; some other skirts; a couple day dresses; a bunch of shirts and blouses; a bunch of camisoles; a black silk dress for Little Black Dress purposes and a matching jacket in case of funerals; three full and two half slips; and a bunch of sweaters for various purposes. I'm going to make all this stuff as classic and basic as I can, but make it all fit incredibly well, put extra room in the seams in case I gain more weight, and take really good care of it. I will be set for any possible job interview, most special occasions, and any job I manage to get (unless it provides a uniform in which case I would be set anyway).

Then I will buy some good neutral shoes in classic styles and a good-quality purse that I can carry year-round that will look professional and also be at least twice the size of the one I have all my crap crammed into now. And every season or so, I will change my accessories.

I have a color palette. My fall/winter suits are going to be black and charcoal, the summer ones will be white and navy, and I have a list of six or seven colors that everything else will be that I can then wear with any of those pieces. I have it written down somewhere. What I need to do next, really, and as soon as possible, to really get this project rolling, is drive over to Jackson and get fitted for some new bras. I know my 30Fs aren't fitting right anymore. I've been estimating that I wear a 30FF now, but I have never actually been fitted, and I should do that, and buy some bras I can try on first instead of ordering them online. Then I can make sure everything fits over, you know, properly fitting undergarments.

Then I have to buy all my fabric for each suit at once, and preferably for all four at once, but I'm going to leave the jackets until last to make because I'm going to have to disappear into a couple of tailoring books before I get started or they will turn out like something out of the Simplicity catalog. (Do not stiffen your suit jacket collars with fusible interfacing. And please, please do not bag line them. Just: no.)

But so okay, here's the other thing. I have these two poly satin camisoles that I picked up from Sears a year or so ago because they were on sale for $5. They don't fit right, obviously. I am currently sitting with one of them on my lap with a couple dozen pins in it, having determined what kinds of darts and tucks I need to take in it to make it fit. And I am basting them in to check the fit, and then I am going to dismantle it and put it back together again--properly--and when it fits and is happy I will then take it apart again and trace out a pattern from it. Because? It is probably the best way to figure out what shapes I need if I'm cutting something on the bias.

It is empire-waisted. Taking bigger bust darts and moving things around makes it a lot lower cut than it was probably intended to be, but not indecently so, and there is enough fabric there to cover my tits all the way to the bottom, which was a pleasant surprise. Plus I can build whatever underarm dart I need into the underbust seam. I am probably going to base my full slip pattern on this as well, just flare it out over the hips.

Also, I have cut out my burgundy linen and my black linen to make two more basic early period tunics. The black one is going to be knee-length (I had not quite three yards of 55" fabric) but the burgundy one will go all the way to the floor. When I have those constructed, and have finished the blue wool one, I'm going to cut out my green wool twill and make another floor-length one. Four tunics, no waiting. I can layer them in different ways for temperature control. Eventually I'm going to need several more, but it's not a bad start.
slythwolf: Some unlucky soul has an incomplete Pai Sho set. (Default)
So I took this book out of the library. It is one of those books that teaches you how to dress for your body type, which was not something I have ever paid a whole lot of attention to because I have pretty much always worn jeans and T-shirts. Which is fine, but I'm job hunting again, and I'm 26 now (be 27 in omg two and a half months), and you can pull off more casual outfits for interviews when you are still in college, but I am not. I need to learn how to dress myself for the professional world.

Now, I am an hourglass. It was fairly inevitable that I would be. I had always been told I was pear-shaped, but that was partially because my mother expected my body to settle out basically into the same shape as hers, and it hasn't. I thought it had, but then it turned out my 32Bs (probably 28Ds or DDs the whole time) became 30FFs and I have a very short torso. I am not the long skinny flat-chested woman with hips that my mother is. I am a short, very curvy torso with long limbs. It is not the same thing.

And so I have checked out this book. It is pretty useful, but there is this phrase it keeps using over and over and over again, and it could mean one of two things.

The phrase is "if your curves are not too voluptuous". (Sometimes it says "baroque" instead of "voluptuous", and I have no fucking clue what that's supposed to mean.) Now, by "voluptuous" it could mean "really super extra hourglassy" (as in "having of enormous tits and ass, proportionately speaking"), which I am, in which case I want to avoid those shapes. Or it could mean "if you're really fat", which, first of all, if you are fat, people are going to be able to tell, and the same shapes will still pretty much look good on you as if you were the same shape but skinny, except that the culture and the fashion industry and all of that wants you to know that you have to somehow camouflage the fact that you are fat so that nobody notices. Which is impossible. And also, I am not actually very fat, so for those two reasons (I'm not very fat and also it is bullshit for the book to care), I would then be able to wear those shapes.

So that's a dilemma. And it brings me to my rant: if you mean fat, fucking say so. Or if you must use a euphemism, make sure it's clear in context what your euphemism means. If you are talking to hourglass-shaped women, and you use "voluptuous" to mean fat--yeah, some of us are going to be confused. Because it can also mean "really curvy"--now, okay, "curvy" is also used as a euphemism for fat women, which is also bullshit, because some fat women are curvy but others are straight-up-and-down. And the same is true of skinny women.

Meanwhile my other bit of confusion about this phrase is the following: if it does mean "you can't wear this garment if you have enormous tits and ass", is that because it looks bad, or because standard sizes of certain shapes don't fit people with teeny waists and enormous tits and asses? Because if it's the latter, I can get around that. I have a sewing machine, I know how to order from Bravissimo, it is all good.

To sum up: Dear book-writing fashion-type people, please do not assume everyone knows what you mean. Explain yourselves.


May. 29th, 2009 09:32 am
slythwolf: Some unlucky soul has an incomplete Pai Sho set. (Default)
Some of you may be aware that I'm working on knitting myself a winter jacket. It's in a bulky (or possibly super-bulky) wool I picked up on eBay a couple of years ago and suddenly got inspiration for, that cost me about $10 IIRC, and is in linen stitch. The neat thing about linen stitch is, at least from my experience with this, it's not as stretchy or stretchy in the same way as stockinette; it's a slip pattern, and those horizontal bits you see in the image of the right side of the fabric are what knitters call "floats", basically places where you pull the yarn across to the next stitch instead of making a new one right there, and in essence when people talk about linen stitch "mimicking" a woven pattern, what they're overlooking is that it is partially woven. Which means it has a grain, and bias, sort of in a similar way that regular woven fabric has. Which is neat, and helps me out with how I'm going to cut a woven lining. (This is pretty scratchy stuff, it needs a lining.)

I am hoping to be able to pick up some Thinsulateā„¢ to interline it with, because as Nigel rightly pointed out one layer of wool is not as hardcore as Michigan winters really need. But the two yards I found on eBay have expired, and me too broke to pay for them; and most of my Googling has turned up those pre-made jacket liners, which will not in any way fit into the jacket I have designed.

It's going to actually fit me, you see.

Standard, commercially available jackets--and liners made for them--don't.

In light of that, some lessons I have learned in the process of designing this thing:

- just how short my torso is (armpit to waist: 7"--and I'm 5'8")
- just how big my boobs are
- just how enormous the difference really is between my waist and hip measurements (28" and 42", respectively, but now I've seen it in the "skirt" of this jacket, and holy crap)
- that my "hip" measurement is mostly ass, which is why my pants never fit (for both meanings of the word "pants")
- that I apparently have a knack, an instinct, for draping patterns
- that flying by the seat of my pants in knitting flat pattern shapes works better than trying to work out all the math ahead of time
- that I can totally crib these same pattern shapes and use them to make, like, linen summer dresses

I am almost finished with the "skirt" pieces, at which point I'll have to tackle the sleeves. I want to put the seam at the back like in Elizabethan clothing, because I have side-front and side-back seams rather than an actual side seam and I think it would be attractive to line it up with the back one, and because it works with the kind of cuff I want to do. But we'll see what I come up with.

Then I have to baste the whole thing together and figure out where, along the side-front seams, I want the pockets to fall. And whether I should bother putting in an inside breast pocket.

Then eventually I have to start thinking about buttons.
slythwolf: Some unlucky soul has an incomplete Pai Sho set. (Default)
I couldn't tell you for sure that I haven't been posting Sunday ADD Blogging because I haven't been remembering to take my medication, but I can tell you I'm posting today because I did.

I had an epiphany about my meds this morning. My meds make me seek out what, a year and a half ago when I was still in college, I used to call "mindless busy-work". I guess I would still call it that. But where before, I would avoid it whenever possible, forget to do it, and not be able to concentrate if I did manage to sit down to it, now I find myself looking for it. For instance: I can sit down to knit and just knit.

Oh, sure, I could do that before, if the project was ridiculously complicated and I'd never done it before; my interest in seeing what it looked like as I went would keep me going. Now I can sit down to, say, learn linen stitch, and do a whole swatch without the TV on, without a fanfic in my web browser, without holding a book open with my feet. Without music playing, even.

And I thought, this morning, well, it was the busy-work that killed me when I went to college. So, with my medication, I could go back if I wanted.

I kind of want to. I kind of can't decide what I would go for.

[ profile] ginmar sometimes posts links to stuff about tiny houses, and last night I followed a link of hers to the Tiny House Blog, and I followed more links from there to other things, and I thought, you know, when I was five I wanted to be an architect. I still pretty much only use the Sims to build houses. I'm not sure if what I actually want, you know, is to be an interior designer, or something, but I think it would be a cool thing to get into. I get intimidated by the idea of going to school for another seven to ten years, but maybe if I took it a step at a time, say, a pre-professional degree and then a Masters program, I could do it. Apparently the way it works is, you get a Masters in architecture, and then you have to intern under an architect for, like, three years before you yourself take the exam. So it would be about ten years before I was actually An Architect. Or I could get a pre-professional degree, look for a job at an architecture firm, and become a building designer, which you can get certified for after you've worked for a while, but you aren't required (it looks good on your resume, basically, and helps you look good to clients), and you pretty much have to work with an actual architect because your plans are going to have to be signed off by one. This second option would take less time but I would never be able to make the kind of money I would with an M.Arch.

And then of course there's my knitting and sewing. I do still want to make historical clothing for people, but I'm starting to think I should go to fashion school if I want to do that, if only to learn how to make patterns. If I went to fashion school, I would probably get a job designing for some line that gets sold at, like, JCPenney, and work on my historical costuming business in my spare time. Or--and this is something I'm just starting to consider, just now--I could start the only US-based company, to my knowledge, that would make my bra size, and eventually, maybe, do something similar to Bravissimo, in that I would have a line of clothing, not just lingerie, for busty women from skinny to fat, but I don't think I would want to start my own chain of stores, so much as try to get specialty lingerie stores to carry my products. That would be something that would take a long time to work out, though, and I would still have to have a day job designing for some department store line, possibly forever. Fashion school would not take as long as architecture school, I'm fairly sure, but the entry-level pay isn't nearly as good, either.

One thing I could do, though, if I started that company, would be to have a range of shapes (like Bravissimo's Curvy, Really Curvy and Super Curvy) for bottoms as well as tops. That's one of the things I'm sad about, is that if I ever have the cash to order a suit from Bravissimo, only the jacket is really going to fit. I know Fashion Bug, Lane Bryant and Catherines have the Right Fit line, but--this is the thing--it doesn't actually go curvy enough for me. I know I am not the only one. Just among my circle of friends and acquaintances there are women far more pear-shaped1 than I. And there is a busty body type where the waist and hips fit fine into standard clothing sizes and it's only the bust that's different, but there are also those of us who are just a serious hourglass, and, for instance, Right Fit's insistence that with a 28" waist there's no way my hips can be bigger than 39.5" (they're 42") is just annoying. Also, Right Fit needs to come in skirts and, in fact, in some more styles of pants than they've got. More colors! More styles of jeans!

Okay, I'm getting carried away with this. The point is, my meds are making me able to do things that I could not do before, and I could go back to school if I wanted to. Significant fact: I have had Firefox open the entire time I've been writing this post, and I've only clicked over to it to look up the names of the Right Fit stores and the exact measurement range described above.

And I've only got one tab open. I did two different things in succession, not concurrently, without forgetting what the second one was.

I would probably still need reasonable accomodations. I would want to be able to tape my lectures, maybe get a little extra time on tests, things like that. But I could do it.

1. I don't actually consider myself pear-shaped, so much as hourglass, because I have enormous breasts now. But until I went on birth control, I was a pear all the way.
slythwolf: Some unlucky soul has an incomplete Pai Sho set. (Default)
Seriously, people. If I tell you I wear a 30F (UK size, which is a 30G in most US manufacturers), that means my bust measurement is about 37-38". When I say David's Bridal doesn't carry my size in a longline bra, I'm talking about the fact that mainstream stores don't carry any bras in 28 or 30 bands higher than a B cup (or a C at the outside), because it's common knowledge that nobody but preteens has a ribcage that small. In other words, David's Bridal doesn't carry my bra size because I am too skinny.

I'm really trying not to write this post in a way that comes off as, "But I'm not fat!" Because there's not one goddamn thing wrong with being fat. But it is also true that I'm...not. My thin privilege doesn't go away because I have big tits. It sticks around. It gets modified by the carrot-and-stick that is big-tits-having privilege/oppression, which is made up of all the ways the patriarchy uses me and women like me to fuck with all the rest of you and make you feel like you're supposed to get implants, and all the ways the patriarchy uses my tits as an excuse to punish me for existing while female. And also all the ways the fashion industry ignores body shapes that don't conform to their standard pattern shapes, which is damn near everybody.

But my size is not made a problem for me. I can shop at mainstream clothing stores and tend to wear a medium or large. My wedding dress was a size 10, which translates to about a 6 or 8 in normal sizing because wedding dress sizes are insane. It would have had to be bigger if it had a fitted skirt, because I have hips and an ass, and as the matter stood my tits were not entirely contained in the tit section of the bodice (it wasn't long enough vertically), but they were entirely contained within the dress. I did not have to special order anything. I did not worry, when I went into David's Bridal, that they might not carry dresses big enough for me. I knew they weren't going to be able to sell me anything I liked in my price range, but that's another issue; the point is that when I say, "I wear a 30F, they don't carry my bra size," it's ridiculous for someone to come back with, "Yeah, it's tough being plus-sized. Were you able to find a dress?"

F-cups are not as big as you think they are, people. I know what you picture, if you A) haven't seen me/pictures of me1 within the past year and B) don't wear a small band and a large cup yourselves (or are close to someone who does). You picture a bra with cups big enough to rock a baby in. You wonder how I can stand up, how I can balance, you tell me it's okay if I want to get a reduction. So I am giving you some homework.

Go to your local Walmart or a department store. Go to the lingerie section. Find a bra that is a 36D or a 38C.

Look at the cups.

That is how big my tits are. It's just that my ribcage is only 28-29" around.

And for those of you who are very confused, when I say "30F", the "30" part is the band of my bra, not my dress size.

1. The picture I photoshopped red hair onto a couple weeks ago doesn't count, because it was taken when I was 20. I was wearing a 32B then, although I should probably have been in a 30C; I weighed 120 pounds then2 and have gained 40 in the interim.
2. I used to be really skinny. My hips have always been wide compared to the rest of me because that's just how the bones are set, but if I could find a dress with a full skirt I used to be able to buy it in a size 2.


Nov. 20th, 2008 01:08 am
slythwolf: Some unlucky soul has an incomplete Pai Sho set. (Default)
Check out the vintage wool coat I just bought. I can't wait until it gets here. I really need a new winter coat; the one I have, I bought something like six years and thirty-five pounds ago, so it doesn't really fit anymore. And since this one is below knee-length, it will be extra warm and cozy. Also: $33!


slythwolf: Some unlucky soul has an incomplete Pai Sho set. (Default)

October 2012



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